Tuesday, October 19, 2004

I'm Not Sorry

I'm Not Sorry is a web site for women who have had abortions and don't regret it. On their web site, we are called "anti-choicers". Believe it or not, I hadn't heard that term before. I don't think it's applicable. I'm not anti-choice, because to me there is no choice being offered here. I refuse to kill any baby that I ever become pregnant with. Whether the child is a result of rape or if it will have some sort of disease or malformation, I will NEVER have an abortion.

Sure, some will say I don't understand what they are going through. I don't know what it's like to be raped and I've never been faced with the prospect of having a child with some sort of debilitating illness. No, I don't know what it's like, but you know what? They won't know how I feel either, because each situation is different. Each person is different. I will state it again: I will NEVER have an abortion.

The site offers a couple places for women to write in with their stories. Here's a clip from one:
Its a shame that we cant speak about abortion in our society in a positive light. And when I think about the whole stem cell research debate going on..it saddens me to know that other people who could benefit from aborted fetuses; are denied the groundbreaking medical procedures that could help them! In my opinion stem cells should be set up like any other organ donation program, and it should be safe, and legal. The bottom line is, women will always get abortions; so why not let somebody else benefit from them. To me its no more appalling then people who freeze their eggs or sperm, or become a surrogate mother. Nobody is shocked by that though. If the Right-to-Lifers want to talk about God, maybe they should start with those people since they think all babies are such a Gift from God, why do some people have to manipulate their sperm and eggs to have one?? Im guessing they probably couldnt answer that because they are too busy harrassing women at the abortion clinics.Thats what really pissed me off when I had my abortion, those damn protesters! I tell you what though, I smiled at each one of them when I left the clinic that day because it was my money, my body, and my God-given right to choose, and I was happy I did it.
In their FAQ page you'll find this:

If you listen to the anti-choicers, they would have you believe that full-term babies are being ripped out of wombs and having their heads bashed in, when in fact what’s being removed is an alien-looking clump roughly the size of a kidney bean. Many anti-choicers will of course say that we’re avoiding reality by believing that what’s removed during an abortion isn’t a baby. We reply that many people avoid reality by believing that every woman gets gooey over babies and wants to be a mother. . .

Looks like it's time for a little elementary sex education. Children are conceived through sexual intercourse between a man and a woman with either no or failed contraception. We’ve slept with men who thought they were God, but the actual Big Guy himself has no hand in it. And there’s quite a few people on the planet who (hang on to your hats) don’t believe in any sort of deity. We would like to believe that if there was a supreme being of some sort, it wouldn’t sit around saying, “Hmm, I think that I’ll give this 14-year-old girl who still sucks her thumb and sleeps with her teddy bear a baby. And hey, what about that woman who was just raped? A baby would cheer her right up, I bet. How about the low-income woman who uses birth control faithfully? Hey, babe, you just won the Rate Of Failure Lottery!” And if it did do those things, well, who’d blame us for rejecting it. . .

Ah, now we’re getting to the real issue. Remember, it was only very recently that women have been “allowed” to enjoy sex, and a lot of people are still suspicious of women who are free in their sexuality, a leftover from the joyless Puritans who founded this country. Quite frankly, we’d prefer it if the anti-choicers would just come out and say, “Since our religion or upbringing tells us that enjoying sex is a sin and we’re so sexually repressed we squeak, we think that any woman who has sex for any reason other than to conceive is a whore. And that includes rape, which wouldn’t happen if you didn’t lead that guy on by looking in his direction for two seconds or wearing that short little skirt or owning a vagina.” Also, we consider the “why didn’t you keep your legs closed” thing pretty funny anyway, considering that many of the abortions performed in America are on married women who already have kids (and whose husbands probably complain that they don’t open their legs enough).

Taken out of context, this is the smartest quote I found on the site: "But you know what would really reduce abortion rates? If parents taught their children to love themselves first and not depend on another person for their happiness." Their idea of teaching kids to love themselves is to teach them "that masturbation is a healthy sexual expression, that it’s not for “losers that can’t get any” or a sin, and is 100% guaranteed not to cause pregnancy or disease."


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